The Master of All Master Lists

For us, Netflix can sometimes serve as the great babysitter of date nights. Early on in our marriage, we found ourselves settling for Netflix & Nap date nights instead of initiative-filled, camaraderie-building, and depth-cultivating date nights. This whole experiment in marital bliss came out of a season of myself dropping the ball and ultimately wanting something more (For the record, a Netflix & Nap date is sometimes the greatest need for a date night, however, for us, it became babysitter and not a catalyst).

The Master of All Master Lists has been a fun and helpful resource for us. These are a few thoughtful and stimulating questions that will hopefully lead to greater intentionality and discovery of one another. This could even help serve as a catalyst for some great date night plans. Fellas, if she fills the entire list out, you’ll have more ideas than you know what to do with and should shed light on tough questions like: What can I ask? How can I serve? What should I give? What can I do? How can I change? What do you need?


  1. What are ways I can be praying for you?
  2. What are the most helpful ways for me to encourage you?
  3. Are there certain ways I’m wired and gifted to encourage you (writing, poetry, massages, singing, gift-giving etc.)?
  4. Is there anything I do that discourages you?
  5. Is there anything I could adjust hygiene-wise (shave, trim nails, change colognes, lose weight, etc.)?
  6. Are there any helpful questions I could ask to more deeply connect with you?
  7. Is there anything that would for sure not encourage you?
  8. Pet names I’ve given you that you are flattered by? Not flattered by?

Clothing & Accessories

  1. What are your favorite stores to shop at?
  2. What are you favorite types of shoes?
  3. Where do you like to get fancy dresses from? What kind of style?
  4. Where do you like to get accessories from? Colors? Styles? Rings? Necklace? Earings?
  5. What are your sizes? Shoe? Dress? Shirt? Waist? Neck? Fingers?
  6. Favorite perfume scents? Bath & Body Works fragrances?
  7. Who are your favorite clutch and purse designers?
  8. Favorite places to shop in a nearby major city?
  9. Favorite places to shop that are off the beaten path?

Food & Dining

  1. What are your favorite local restaurants?
  2. What are your favorite dishes for take-out from nearby restaurants?
  3. Where are your favorite desserts for take-out from nearby restaurants?
  4. What are your favorite upscale restaurants in other cities?
  5. What meal do you love that I can prepare for you?
  6. What are your favorite ice cream flavors?
  7. What are your favorite pizza toppings?


  1. Who are your favorite authors? Genres?
  2. Is there a magazine you enjoy reading?
  3. Who are your favorite musicians? Bands? Instrumentalists?
  4. What are your favorite plays? Anything from Broadway?
  5. Do you have a favorite park nearby? Far away?
  6. Who are your favorite poets you enjoy reading?
  7. Who are your favorite actors/actresses for a surprise movie night? Favorite movies?
  8. Are you interested in attending any major/minor sporting events?
  9. Are there any date night activities you would like for me to make happen?
  10. What activities/hobbies do you enjoy doing together?


  1. Do you have a favorite place nearby to get a massage? Pedicure? Manicure?
  2. Do you have a favorite refreshing drink?
  3. What are your favorite teas and coffees?
  4. How are you most refueled? Resting? Shopping? Time off? Time to think and plan?
  5. If you had a weekend getaway with your friends, who would you want there? Where would you want to go?


  1. What are your favorite flowers?
  2. Where would you like gift cards from?
  3. What drink do you love at Starbucks?
  4. Is there a city somewhat nearby that you’re interested in visiting?
  5. What household tasks would be surprising if I completed them?
  6. What is your favorite candy?
  7. If we did something adventurous deep down you want to try?
  8. What are some of your most ideal vacation/retreat destinations?
  9. What home surprises would you like for our home (appliances, fixes, renovations, etc.)?
  10. Is there any gift that you have been desiring for a while?